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June 29, 1997

On the Road Again

Dear Neighbors:

It really hurts me to offer gratuitous gratitudes to government workers, but I think District residents owe a round of kudos to folks managing our roads and bridges. Imagine the situation from their perspective. For years the staff sat at their drawing boards on their thumbs designing projects that the city had no hope of funding. Finally, Uncle Sugar grants DC a waiver, the financial floodgates open, and seemingly every piece of infrastructure is being rebuilt, resurfaced, or repolished. The staff has to rev from zero to 60 faster than an Indie car. I suspect these words will come back to haunt me — rush projects are usually rife with overpayments, bad decisions, and occasionally corruption — but cynicism aside, these civil servants are busting their bums for us. Let’s all say words of thanks to them. A good time might be when we are hung up in construction zones.

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Well, it looks like there will be tax relief on the horizon for District tax payers. Since the Senate, House, and White House all want a package, it looks like something will be passed. I predicted years ago that Congress wouldn’t provide comprehensive tax relief. That Congress didn’t but this one will. So here’s my next worthless prediction. Congress will like this bill so much they’ll extend it to communities all over the country, making our exemptions practically meaningless. Oh me of little faith.

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Talk about constricting speech. We’ve heard the District wants to charge news organizations $22.50 per square foot for using the press room — plus the Miss Utility costs. (Does anyone know why she never got married?) Per my source, Barry’s press flak Ramone Baine tried pinning the blame on Sharon Pratt Kelly. When that gambit didn’t work, she used the excuse that city really needs the money. When asked what happens to the space if news organizations refuse to pay — the Associated Press has already said they rather leave than pay — she said the space would go to the Council. First prize to anyone who can demonstrate at least 10 logical flaws in these arguments. Hey, why not be honest. Barry to press. "We’re charging market rates to reduce scrutiny of District government operations. Sorry to inconvenience you but there’s an election coming up."

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Also free! dc.movie: Free movie passes, short movie reviews, and movie discussion. Send an email message to story@intr.net to subscribe.

Cheers,
Jeffrey Itell

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Mr. Henry’s

Mr. Henry’s at 1344 U Street is slated to close in the near future. Manager Ann Vigas cites a recent robbery and overall poor business as the reason, but she promises to re-open, and to provide a stage for those Sunday stalwarts Faith and Jude. But until those doors shut, you can come sweat bullets with Faith Dane, of Gypsy Fame, and her loyal guitar strumming husband Jude this Sunday, June 29th. Showtime, 8:30PM, or when the audience reaches critical mass (last week it was five persons). It’s free.

Jeffrey H. Krulik jeff.krulik@internetmci.com

[Jeff’s film about life on the road with Ernest Borgnine — in one of those Jet stream things — just received another favorable review in Washington City Paper. jeff]

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Duke Ellington’s Hometown.
Jon Desenberg jondes@hotmail.com

More concerned about Jazz 90 than UDC? Its true I am, but there are at least eight colleges and universities in the immediate area, there are no other true Jazz stations. Its true, more people on this list will probably be impacted by the loss of the station than by the loss of the University. Somebody had to say it. The leftist drivel they serve up via the Pacifica network is enough to drive anyone into the arms of Rush Limbaugh. Any ideas on how we might get them to pick up some of Jazz 90’s national programming (i.e. Billy Taylor’s Jazz at the Kennedy Center, Jazz profiles, Marian McPartland’s Piano Jazz)? How can this happen in Duke Ellington’s hometown?

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Used Book Store
E. James Lieberman, M.D. ejl@gwis2.circ.gwu.edu

One of the outstanding used book stores in the area is a block from my office, on Connecticut Ave. NW near Chevy Chase Circle and next to the Avalon Theater. It’s "Alphaville" and stocks quality paper- & hardback books at reasonable prices. Right now books are overflowing the shelves. I put in a plug because it’s the kind of business I hope will stay in place for a long time!

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VT not VA
Michelle Treistman mtreistman@pccii.com

Dear Mr. Bergman: If the "A" were any closer to the "T" on the keyboard, I might have chosen not to reply. But, it isn’t, and the last time I looked, Sen. James Jeffords was a Republican from Vermont; VT for any concerned users of the U.S. Mail system. I enjoy Carl’s contributions to DC Story. As a former resident of the Green Mountain State, however, I just want to make sure that the readers of this newsletter are not confused about state abbreviations and Senators.

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Glorious Leader
Ed T. Barron edtb@aol.com

Dear Friends: In response to Jeff’s (Our Glorious Leader’s) request to stop being preachy and pedantic and to write as if I were writing to a friend, my only inputs to this forum will now have a more warm and fuzzy aura. Although my "ideas are great", according to Jeff, the "pendantry gets in the way" .For those inputs that I cannot (or will not) put into a "dear friends" format, the ideas, criticisms, and suggestions on making our city a better place to live will have to be sent directly to those who can benefit from a little preaching and even pendantry. These missives will go to the WashPost, K. Patterson, Gen’l Becton, and Andy Brimmer. They will not darken (or enlighten) the screens of this forum. And so dear friends, have a nice day. Warmly yours,

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ATF Headquarters
T. Jr. Hardman - Rockville (and hating it) klaatu@clark.net

In response to Tom Berry’s remarks concerning the relocation of the ATF headquarters out of the District and into Virginia, I must say that I applaud the move, although one may question the relocation to Virginia over some other location.

Certainly any major relocation of a major-agency headquarters to any particular location will inevitably smack of "pork", I cannot sufficiently strongly applaud any move of such headquarters away from the troubled District. It’s not so much that I hate the District (I hold the monumental core and all of that for which it stands, in unmixed high esteem), as I fear that no matter the remedial moves to bolster security in the form of enhanced police presence or even massive "bunkering" of downtown facilities, the simple fact is that the ATF building was located in a section of town known for indefensibility, massive foreign presence, and often-impassable traffic. Face it, the ATF is a paramilitary organization, and essentially forcing the head strategists to take public transportation to a facility located in occupied territory is quite mad. The ATF or any other essential agency should be relocated to much more rural settings, where access can be controlled with a buffer zone of barriers and open spaces which (should it come to that) could be easily defended with clear fire zones and multiple passive access control zones. For instance, you wouldn’t put the Pentagon in Chinatown, now would you?

I personally favor a nationwide distribution of as many agencies as is practicable - in the days of the InterNet, there simple no reason to base your HQ location planning on an outmoded psychology based on the need to be able to run right down the street with a briefcase full of documents and be able to deliver hard copy within the half-hour. Remote locations of HQ provides a hedge against any attempts to crack all of the eggs that are presently sitting in one badly-damaged basket.

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Library Loops
David Sobelsohn dsobelso@capaccess.org

I walked into my neighborhood branch of the DC Public Library t’other day, hoping to renew a book I had just returned. Found it at the front desk. Tried to renew it. Response: sorry. Book belongs to the main library. We need to return it there, first, then they have to reshelve it—which might take 2 weeks—then you have to call over, maybe repeatedly, to MLK (the main library) to check on whether they’ve reshelved it, then ask MLK to send it back to the branch, then call the branch, maybe repeatedly, until it’s received from MLK, then borrow it from the branch. When I complained that this seemed like a needlessly circuitous route to borrow a book that was staring me in the face, the librarian suggested that I had erred in returning the book on time & should’ve just kept it a few more days. Is this any way to run a railroad?

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Statehood Is At Hand
Joseph R. Poisso Joseph.poisso@clickers.org

So Congress caused the school board not to make school repairs, padded the payroll at children’s expense and made board members take a pay raise at the same time? Congress forced district school students to have the lowest achievement scores in the nation? In the race to the bottom, the District managed to even beat Louisiana which holds last place among fifty states. Congress did that and is responsible for teachers and student being beaten, knifed, robbed and raped? If a Democrat president had a child, I sure he would put her in a District managed school.

Congress is responsible for turning every city function into a job’s program? Congress don’t pick up the trash or fix potholes? Congress instituted a snow removal program called Waiting for Spring? Congress makes citizens wait for hours for normal government services like licenses and tags? Congress makes citizens afraid to walk to the Metro, to the park, to the store, especially after sunset? All roads may lead to the Hill but not before first looping several times around a few district buildings. Actually all roads lead out of town judging by the number of residents leaving. Congress made them leave? Get over it, statehood is at hand.

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Trash Pick-up
Andrew Aurbach apaurbach@mindspring.com

From what I understand, the Department of Public Works provides twice weekly trash pickup in neighborhoods where either 1) supercans are not easily stored by residences, or 2) the neighborhood lacks a web of sufficient alleys for efficient trash removal. These neighborhoods would generally include the Dupont and Georgetown areas. On another note, is anyone aware of any statutes or codes which regulate the proximity of commercial dumpsters to residential properties?

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Trash Pick-up
Nick Keenan nkeenan@gsionline.com

Nothing I have ever sent to dc.story has ever provoked as much reaction as my disclosure that in my neighborhood we get TWO garbage pickups per week! Envy, scorn, jealousy, disbelief — the entire range of human emotion has played itself out in my email box over the past few days. I laughed, I cried — it was the feel-good email of the year.

My understanding of the DPW rule is this: if you put your garbage in the alley, you get garbage pickup once a week. If you put it on the curb, it gets picked up twice a week. Please feel free to correct me if you know more about this topic — garbage is one of those subjects where everyone has something to contribute.

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Trash Pick-up
Dan Emberley, (livin’ in Dupont and liking it)

Neighborhoods that get trash picked up 2X/week are those that are dense enough. The justifications include insufficient places to store trash in each unit; discourage rats; and two reasonable-size truck loads, vs. very large loads that would require trucks that would have more difficulty on city streets. Double trash pickup is not something to be astonished at — it’s a requirement given some of the other trade-offs one accepts living between Florida Avenue and the Mall.

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Nixon et. al.
Leila Afzal leila.afzal@noaa.gov

I was a young teenager during the ‘72 elections. My parents were McGovernites, so was I. I was one of only a few kids in my high school who dared wear a McGovern button, and on the Wednesday after election day Tim Rock (I even remember his name) walked up to me, glowered and said "Ha...Ha...Ha." Two years later I was visiting my mother’s family in Switzerland, they spoke only German and I English. My uncle ran and pulled me over to the TV to watch Nixon give a speach. Unfortunately, there was a German voice-over and I couldn’t figure out what was going on. My family quite excitedly tried to get me to understand. Finally, my uncle looked at me and said "Nixon Kaput." That I understood and I rejoiced. That fall when I returned to school, on the first day I walked right up to Tim Rock and said "Ha....Ha....Ha." One gets so few moments like that in life.

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dc.queries

A friend, a foreign service officer is being harassed by DC Tax Office for claiming homestead exemption on her home in DC, which she rented out, while posted overseas. This is the only real estate she owns, anywhere, so I don’t see why she is not entitled to claim homestead exemption for it. I need referral to either attorney, or other expert - perhaps former foreign service officer maybe specializing in these types of matters ?

Paul Foldes phone: 703-370-0009 pfoldes@interhelp.com

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dc.events

Footlights—the Modern Drama Discussion Group

We meet every month to discuss modern drama—& membership is free! At our July meeting we’ll discuss BECKET (1960), the Tony Award-winning play later made into an Oscar-winning film with Richard Burton & Peter O’Toole .Join us Tuesday, July 15, at the North China Restaurant, 7814 Old Georgetown Rd. in Bethesda. Dinner begins at 6:30 & our discussion at 7:45, & our special guest will be JIM PETOSA, director of the Olney Theatre production of BECKET which opens July 22. For reservations send e-mail to skimmel@fcc.gov or call Mark Gruenberg at 202-338-7013 (h) or 638-0444 (w). To join the Footlights on-line list, send the message "join theatre" (without quote marks) to theatre-req@jskay-consulting.com. Visit our website at http://www.jskay-consulting.com/footlights/. Address general inquiries to David Sobelsohn, dsobelso@capaccess.org.

David Sobelsohn dsobelso@capaccess.org

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dc.market

Housing For Rent

Capitol Hill early 30s writer seeking two house mates to replace two leaving in a house that does not feel like a "group house." Have your own bathroom and large bedroom in a beautifully restored 3-bedroom, 3-bath row house between Eastern Market metro and Lincoln Park, on one of the neighborhood’s nicest streets. August 1, room for two more to share large living and dining rooms, kitchen, A/C, washer/dryer, fireplace, backyard, but have privacy/quiet when desired. Rent $517 per month plus utilities.

Lora Engdahl 202-544-2485 lorae444@aol.com

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For Sale

Dining room set, Duncan Phyfe, includes drop-leaf rectangular table with chairs upholstered in cream colored brocade, china cabinet, and server, asking ?750 or best offer. Also, cabinet from China, asking ?850 or best offer. Please call (202) 623-1365 (w) before 6:00 or (202) 363-8571 (h).

Carla White carlaw@iadb.org

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For Sale

Apple Macintosh SE; a great little computer for word processing and introducing yourself to the wonderful world of the Macintosh. The SE has 2 MB of RAM, a 20 MB hard drive, Microsoft Word v4.0, TeachText (later known as SimpleText), SAM Virus Intercept, and games like Risk, GoMoku, and Solitaire. Keyboard, mouse, manuals, and System 6.0.8 are included, as well as simple instructions for upgrading. $50 and it can be yours!

Jeff Lins garath@mindspring.com http://www.mindspring.com/~garath/garathpage.html

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Mark, Matt, And Jordan’s Excellent Lawn Service

Three graduating Wilson seniors will cut your grass, weed your yard, and do other landscaping chores this summer. Reasonable and prompt, experienced and hard-working, these young men work in Chevy Chase, Barnaby Woods, Forest Hills, AU Park, and other northwest neighborhoods. Contact Mark Wellborn at 362-6609; Matt Hill at 686-1559; or Jordan Rider at 362-6252.

Stan Wellborn swellborn@brook.edu

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Computers

Buying one shouldn’t be so scary. Setting one up shouldn’t be so scary. Getting on the Internet shouldn’t be so scary.

Jeffrey Itell Story@intr.net 202.244.4163

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